Rodeo Life

Category: JR Vezain

  • The Importance of Patience

    God will always provide. He will provide what we need when we need it. The importance of remaining patient and continuing to trust in his will and his plan is important. Lately, the story of Abraham, Sarah, and their promised son has really intrigued me and inspired me to keep trusting and know that God is faithful.

    In Genesis 18 the story begins with Sarah and Abraham being told by the Lord through three visitors that when one of them returned at that time next year that Sarah would have a son. Sarah laughed to herself thinking she was too old and worn out to bear a child. She didn’t think there was any way that she and Abraham could have a child. In verse fourteen the Lord replied “Is anything too hard for the Lord? I will return about this time next year, and Sarah will have a son.”

    In chapter twenty one, the first verse says “The Lord kept his word and did for Sarah exactly what he had promised.” So, Sarah became pregnant and gave birth to Isaac. This happened at the exact time God said it would. Abraham was a hundred years old at the time of Isaac’s birth. Not only was the birth of Isaac a miracle but a true witness of God’s faithfulness on his timing.

    Abraham and Sarah were promised over twenty five years before this, that they would have a son. Twenty five years, I don’t know about you, but most of the time I don’t even want to wait twenty five minutes let alone years. Human nature is to question the timing of God just as Sarah did. She thought there was no way after so many years that she could have a child, but as we see, since the beginning of time NOTHING is impossible for God. The same is true today. When we think there’s no way we can get our miracle, or when we think its past time, God is always working something out. God is always faithful even when we don’t see it. He’s always working out his plan, on his time, for his glory.

    Well it is hard to remain strong in faith during our waiting seasons you might say. God never promised that waiting would be easy. He never said waiting wouldn’t test us. He never said waiting would be a walk in the park. I will agree, our human nature wants what we think is best for us right now, but in Isaiah 40:31 we see the benefit of waiting through our struggles. “But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.”

    God will keep us going. God will strengthen us through our struggle. When we take our eyes off the mountain, and keep them on the mountain mover, God sustains us! I encourage whoever is reading this to keep going. Don’t give up. Don’t give up on that dream God gave you. Pick it back up and and keep working on it. Keep believing. Keep trusting. Keep waiting patiently. God is faithful and will bring it to pass! Is anything to hard for the Lord?

  • Our Journey

    Our Journey

    For this article I want to give a little progress update thus far in our journey. I say our journey for a reason. There are so many people tied to this story other than just myself. I’m not the only one that has been impacted by this wreck. My wife, my family, my friends, the people I didn’t know before that I have met since, the prayer warriors that are still praying and standing in agreement for the miracle, all the people along the way that have have helped us out, my doctors, therapists, and everyone else in between. I have been blessed with such a huge support group and I can’t thank everyone enough for the prayers, kind wishes, help, and belief in me and what God is doing and going to keep doing through me for his glory at the end of this season. Thanks also, for following along checking in on progress. It’s been a heck of a ride that’s for sure. Bumpy at times with a few steep decline mountain switchbacks but, we’re still on the uphill climb, and I’m not about to let off the throttle just yet.
    So, this is the month that I’m going to have my one year anniversary, post wreck. September 22nd will mark 365 days since we began down this journey. I’ve came a long ways and have learned a lot in the last year. I’ve learned patience. I’ve learned perseverance I didn’t know I had. I’ve learned how to adapt and overcome like never before. I’ve learned the ins one out of wheelchair life. I’ve learned how to be a dad (still learning this one). I’ve learned how to truly put everything in God’s hands and trust his plan. I’ve learned how to place things so I can always access them. I was short before but the last year I’ve been really vertically challenged. But seriously, I thought I knew or had these characteristics before, but I have really learned them and enhanced them in the last year. Although, the situation isn’t ideal for me. I would definitely rather be walking, running, jumping on my feet, I know my character has been refined, built up, enhanced, and made stronger. I know once I’m out of this waiting season all the lessons I’ve learned and the character that’s been built in me will be used for something great down the road for God’s glory.
    On Labor Day, Shelby and I loaded up Ryatt (our son) and headed for Utah. I had been invited to a charity pheasant hunt, that Clint Robinson puts on for people with disabilities. Since I knew I was going to be there for the hunt, I scheduled a week of rehab at my old facility, Neuroworx. I wanted to get retested to see how much progress I’ve made since coming home in April, and see what their thoughts were and what to do moving forward. We checked back into our old apartment room Monday night and prepared for rehab the next morning.
    The next morning it was like dejavu. The room felt the same. The stroll down the sidewalk to rehab was the same. Everything about the morning was like we had never left. We strolled into Neuroworx, and of course everyone was excited to meet the baby. They all came and said hi to the little man. Then, my former therapist from the time I was down before took me back to a mat for retesting. The moment was upon us. Had I made any changes since being home? Had I worked hard enough? Was I going to be able to walk? These thoughts began to flood my mind and I just said a quick prayer to myself and said “Lord, your will be done. Let any new results bring glory to your name. Bless his hands and the work we do this next week. And bless this place as it is changing lives, thank you. In Jesus name, Amen.”
    The first test was a sit up. With my legs hanging off the table, and arms crossed I tried to sit up. I got about half way or a little better. Matt, the therapist was impressed. The time before I could only sit up about a quarter of the way. Next test was a reverse sit up. So leaning forward laying on my lap trying to sit back up straight. I gave it a go and I made it about half way up as well. Time before I couldn’t even get started off my knees. Next test was side to side and forward reach without losing control of my trunk. Each direction I could reach about five inches before loosing control. About four inches more then when I left. This concluded testing and Matt was happy to see I made so much progress. Doesn’t seem like much but in this game progress is progress. He told us first of all we don’t usually see people back when we send them home with an at home program, and we definitely don’t expect to see this good of results from at home therapy. So, I had jumped a level on every test and was on the right track. I didn’t have any new significant leg movements that they felt like I needed to stay and work there yet, but I had made leaps and bounds on trunk control and strength. So, the next step was to work our way down and begin getting more hip control. They said when I get hip control and get those muscles stronger and firing better, it will be a game changer. So, we got to work. The next three days we put our heads together, tried new movements, and came up with a different set of work outs to head home with, challenging me and focusing on getting my glutes to fire, and gaining more control at my waist.
    Then Saturday came. My old leather working buddy from down there, Kent and his son, Craig picked me up and we headed to the bird hunt. There was about twenty other people in wheelchairs all ready to shoot some birds. We gathered around had a little safety meeting, like don’t shoot the vehicle next to you and don’t shoot the dogs. We each loaded up in a side by side and in groups of five we headed to different fields. At each field there was dog handler and a couple dogs. He turned the dogs loose and away we went. We followed behind until the dogs got on point. Once they sniffed one out, a few gathered around it, got set and in position leaning the gun out the front window of the Ranger. Once we were set they would flush them up and the shooting would begin. It was an awesome experience. I hadn’t been bird hunting since high school, so it was good to get back out and do some hunting. It was a great event, and all the help setting up, taking down, and everybody that pitched in to make it all happen is greatly appreciated!
    Over all it was a great trip, filled with good news. God is good and he is faithful. He’s still on the move. We’re still believing in the miracle. We’re back home and back to work, picking away. I’m excited to see where I’ll be in 365 more days!
    “For our present troubles are small and won’t last very long. Yet they produce for us a glory that vastly outweighs them and will last forever!” 2 Corinthians 4:17 NLT

  • Building Your Foundation

    Building Your Foundation

    A house built on a solid foundation is crucial to provide protection and safety to anything that lives inside. The function of a well-built foundation is to hold up and hold together the structure built above it. The foundation increases the amount of abuse the house can take while remaining safe for those living inside. The three main purposes of a building foundation are to bear the weight of the building, increase the stability against natural forces such as wind or shifting ground, and to shield from any other obstacle that might be detrimental to the building or its occupants such as flooding or predators. Just as it is important for a buildings foundation, it is equally important to build our faith on a solid foundation.
    Matthew 7:24-27 tells us “Anyone who listens to my teaching and follows it is wise, like a person who builds a house on solid rock. Though the rain comes in torrents and the floodwaters rise and the winds beat against that house, it won’t collapse because it is built on bedrock. But anyone who hears my teaching and doesn’t obey it is foolish, like a person who builds a house on sand. When the rains and floods come and the winds beat against that house, it will collapse with a mighty crash.”
    The foundation in which we build our faith upon has similar purposes to a buildings foundation. The relationship with God that we have provides stability to bear our weight. We can take all our problems, insecurities, and burdens to him and let him carry the load rather than try to handle them ourselves. The words we bury in our hearts help provide stability against the winds and shifting ground in our lives that try to knock us down. Through our conversations and prayer with Christ we can resist the lies that come from the predator as he tries to flood our minds and wash away our foundation.

    The last eleven months has given me plenty of time to revamp, repatch, and restore any cracks in my foundation. As the devil tries to shift the ground around me, sneak in the basement, and flood my foundation I have spent countless hours seeking God, spending time in his word, and praying to build my foundation stronger so that I can resist against the enemies lies. The foundation I had before has been solid enough to get me this far but since my wreck I have had numerous opportunities to continue to build and solidify my foundation in Christ.
    The thing about building a solid foundation in Christ is not only so we will follow his instructions, but also so we can continue moving forward knowing the best is yet to come when our world gets rocked and knocked upside down. It can become hard to see the light at the end of the tunnel sometimes after months and months of not seeing your dreams come to pass. Or after sometimes years of not seeing change, whether it be in your marriage, your finances, or your physical being when you are seeking healing. The Lord tells us that his word is alive and active, sharper than any double edged sword. The more we bury in our hearts, the more we memorize, and the more we reflect on them, the more weapons we have to combat the devil throughout the day. When he tries telling us this is it, this is all the better it’s going to get we can use Jeremiah 29:11 knowing that God has a plan for our future and his plan is to prosper not to harm us. When the enemy tries to lie to us saying that God doesn’t want to take care of our problems we can use Psalms 55:22 and know that we can give our burdens to the Lord, and he will care for us and not allow us to slip and fall. When Satan tries to tell us since God hasn’t answered your prayer yet he isn’t going to we can use Matthew 7:7 knowing that if we continue to ask he will give us what we ask for. Also, when we don’t know how we are ever going to get out of the situation we are in we can use Isaiah 55:8-9 knowing that God’s ways are not like our ways, and his thoughts are higher than anything we can fathom.
    The foundation we build in Christ has many purposes. To build our character so we follow the Lords instructions. To build our faith in God knowing we can take all our worries, cares and burdens no matter how big or small, to him so he can carry the load rather than try to carry it ourselves. And lastly, so we have a solid base with many weapons in store to resist the devil’s temptations and lies so we can lean on the solidity of the bedrock of Christ. So make sure you are building your foundation on the concrete of Christ so it can stand the storms that come your way!
    “The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety.” Psalms 18:2

  • Don’t Give Up

    Don’t Give Up

    Why is it so important to never give up? Somedays giving up seems like the easy thing to do. We have all had those days where throwing in the towel seems like the right answer. It can be very frustrating working day in and day out towards something and not seeing the results you think you deserve. When you don’t see your hard work bringing you success, it has the tendency to drain you physically, emotionally, and even spiritually. Giving up is the easy way out. But, quitting is not the answer. Giving up will not solve anything!
    “So let’s not get tired of doing what is good. At just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if we don’t give up.”
    Galatians 6:9
    This verse says it all. Even when we think there is no way it will work out. When we are tired of getting beat down. When all the hard work, late nights, failed attempts, and everything else has you drug down, just remember at just the right time we will reap a harvest of blessing if you dig in, dig deep, and don’t give up.
    I heard a saying a while back I find myself referring to constantly on hard days. When I try to wiggle a toe and it still doesn’t wiggle. When I stand up with a walker and think today is the day and my knees still don’t lock. When I try to kick my leg out and it just dangles there. After all this time, approaching 11 months, all the hours of strenuous physical therapy. All the days spent staring at my toes, feet, and legs trying to get them to move. After all these months praying, seeking, reading, and believing. After the constant day in and day out of putting in the effort and working hard to conquer the odds. After all the early mornings and late nights catching a workout in the gym between managing our cattle and getting leather work done, so I can still provide for my family. After all this time, why am I not seeing the success and results I feel like I deserve? This saying helps me a lot, “God loves us too much to deliver us at anytime other than the perfect time.”
    As Isaiah 55:8-9 claims, God’s ways are not like our ways. His thoughts are not like our thoughts. We cannot think like God thinks. We can’t fathom how God works. So who are we to say what we do and don’t deserve? All we are supposed to do is keep believing and not grow tired of doing what is good, because we will reap a harvest of blessing from the seeds we sow. Just like the story of Joseph, he could’ve given up when his brothers sold him into slavery. Or, when he ended up in prison for years. He could’ve quit trying. He could’ve given up on his dream, but he didn’t. He kept doing the tasks that God had laid in front of him day in and day out, and believing in the dream and vision God had given him until at the perfect time God delivered him to be Pharaohs right hand man, and save his family from the 7 year famine.
    So, when you grow tired we can find strength and peace in these promises from God:
    • “Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.” Psalms 55:22
    • “Don’t be afraid, for I am with you. Don’t be discouraged, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.” Isaiah 41:10
    • “For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength.” Philippians 4:13
    • “God blesses those who patiently endure testing and temptation. Afterward they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him.” James 1:12
    When you don’t see any progress, whether it’s in your dream business you’ve started and don’t see growing, your new weight loss program you’ve been doing for months and can’t shake the extra pounds, your physical breakthrough you are working towards, or any other trial that has you wore down and on the brink of giving up. Whatever it is, just remember Romans 8:18 “Yet what we suffer now is nothing compared to the glory he will reveal to us later.” So, dig in, dig deep, keep your vision in front of you, and DON’T GIVE UP!

  • Now Faith

    Now Faith

    What does it mean to have “Now Faith”? I was corrected the other day and said that I need to expand my faith and quit diminishing it by what I claim. The statements I was making such as “I believe I will walk again, whether it is on this earth or the next I’m not sure but, I believe I will walk again.” Now, although you might think this statement is a bold statement and makes the claim of walking again, by not claiming what I originally prayed for shows weakness in my faith! We all know that if we have accepted Jesus as our personal savior that the day we die we will be born again and given a new body in heaven. 2 Corinthians 5 tells us about putting on our new bodies in heaven. So, although by saying “I will walk on this earth or the next” I am claiming truth, but I am diminishing my faith because of course we all know that we will be made new and whole in heaven.
    The day of my accident I prayed for healing. I have had many prayer warriors stand in agreement with me. I truly do believe that I will regain my legs and be healed 100%. Trey Johnson brought this to my attention the other day and taught me the importance of renewing our minds and having “now faith”.
    Matthew 7:7-8 says “Keep on asking and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.”
    From the beginning I prayed for God’s will to be done and to be fully healed. Not partially healed, not somewhat healed, I prayed to be fully healed! I prayed to be healed that night. I prayed to be healed in three months. I prayed to be healed in six months. Now I am approaching ten months post injury still praying for full recovery and believing in Jesus name that I will receive it.
    After 6 months of not receiving what you are praying for it is easier to wonder if it will ever happen. And although I believed, I began wondering if it is God’s will for me to walk. This is a way that Satan lies to us. He begins to sneak in and try to tell us that we won’t receive our miracle on this earth. We have to remember that Isaiah 55:8-9 claims that God’s thoughts are not like our thoughts. And his ways are far beyond anything we can imagine. So, when we don’t exactly receive what we are asking for right when we ask for them, we can’t get discouraged. We have to know that God is working and his ways are higher than our ways, and we must remain patient. We must keep asking and know that we are going to receive at just the right time.
    We also must remember that God spoke everything into existence. Psalms 33:9 says “For he spoke, and it came to be; he commanded, and it stood firm.” So the words we speak about ourselves and our situation are what will become. They are very important. And the beginning of words are thoughts. What we think is what we will talk about. Therefore we must control our mind. It is important to start by renewing our minds and letting God change the way we think so that we can proclaim, and command truth upon our lives.
    Romans 12:2 “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.”
    By letting God transform the way we think and proclaiming his promises they will come to fruition. So, instead of me saying “I will either walk on this earth or the next” I need to say “Lord your will be done. I know I am healed. My back is strong. My legs are strong. My ankles are strong. I can lock my knees. I am able to take steps. By Jesus’ wounds I am healed. Your timing is perfect so I will remain patient. I believe father. Lord you say in Mark 9:23 that anything is possible if a person believes! I will walk again on this earth because you are faithful and I have asked!”
    So, it is a work in progress for me but I have began to let God transform my mind and seek his promises on my life, and within a week of speaking and proclaiming healing on my body I have began to be able to flex my glutes. That’s a huge breakthrough as the glutes and quads are the muscles that will lock my knees and make me able to stand on my own so praise God for that! Hebrews 11:1 describes true faith as believing in the things not yet seen. So, although you may not see your situation changing, you may not see your miracle happening, you may not see any progress, we can all rest assured that faith as small as a mustard seed will move mountains. Don’t weaken, keep believing, keep proclaiming, and know that God is working and will reward faith!
    Matthew 8:13 Then Jesus said to the Roman officer, “Go back home. Because you believed, it has happened.” And the young servant was healed that same hour.

  • Clover

    Clover

    “I don’t know if I could do what you do, handle the situation like you do, and have the attitude like you do.” These are all things that I have heard over and over from people the last nine months since the injury. At first I didn’t know how to respond to these statements because I felt like I was just being me. I have just been trying to handle the situation the best that I can, remain as positive as I can, and leave the rest up to God. The more I hear these statements the more I’ve thought about it, and have come up with a couple reasons as to why I choose to remain positive about the whole situation.
    I don’t know how many of you have been around any clover but on wet years we get a ton of clover in our area. It over flows our pastures and gets thick. It looks like alfalfa, starts small and then as it grows it bushes out and gets thick. It gets really green and makes the area look outstanding. Animals love it and it’s a bonus feed for the spring. From a distance you can’t even tell that it’s clover it just looks tremendously green all over the rolling hills as far as you can see.
    From Shelby and I’s house when you look across the river about a mile, on my in-laws place is where we calve our cows. For about a month as that clover popped up it turned the whole pasture a brilliant green. As green with as much clover as I’ve ever seen around here. Each afternoon I would load up my four wheeler and go with whoever was going to tag calves, usually either Sage my brother in-law, or Liane my mother in-law. I would get on my four wheeler with my rigged up handle to shift and take off. I would go around one side of the pasture looking for new babies. When I would find one I would take my sheep cane in one hand, get up beside the calf, get it hooked around the neck and pull it in towards my four wheeler. Once I got the calf pulled in and stopped, I then could lean off the side and stick a tag in its ear. Sometimes this worked really slick, sometimes I’m sure it was quite the sight to see as I chased the calf around trying to get it snagged. Regardless though I did my best to carry my weight and help out through calving season.
    As the month went on the thicker the clover got in that pasture. As it started to heat up it would start to bloom and get a yellow head on it. The hotter it got the more it turned. From our house, a mile away, you couldn’t tell it was turning yellow at all. You could only see it turning as you were driving or riding through it. All of May from out our front door it still just looked green, but each day when we would go tag calves a little more would bloom. Then about the first week of June, we had a week of sunny and eighty degree weather and it turned the whole pasture a bright dandelion yellow. As far as you can see, its just rolling hills of yellow sweet clover all over.
    This is kind of how I try to handle each hardship I come to. When I come to a storm and it seems like an overwhelming sense of green clover thickening all over my pastures I hold on to the sun and the heat, which represents the Lord and his word. Spending time in prayer, reading his word, and focusing on the hope that he promises us if we trust in him, will make that clover start to bloom. No matter how bad your situation is, remember it can always be worse. Therefore, if you make a habit out of finding the little things to be thankful for it will be like the clover starting to bloom. Little by little you keep finding the positives in every situation, hold on to the promises found in his word, then pretty soon it will be like when the whole pasture blooms and turns yellow. No matter how bad you think you have it when you focus on the little things to be thankful for you it will take your eyes off the mountain and put your gaze on the mountain mover!
    So, to those who say “I don’t think I could handle the situation like you do” I say sure you can. We all have a choice when we wake up. We may not be able to control our circumstances, but we all can control our attitudes. Just because you’re dealt a duce instead of an ace this hand, doesn’t mean it has to affect your frame of mind on life. Just because life got a little hard for a minute doesn’t mean it has to affect your quality of life. Each morning we are all blessed with a breath of fresh air. Each morning we are blessed with a God who loves us enough that he sent his son to die on the cross for our sins. No matter what you are facing and how bad it seems God has a plan for you and there is always something to be thankful for. Remember when you are complaining that somebody out there would love to have what you are complaining about, so find the positives, trust in the Lord, and keep stepping forward.
    “Always be joyful. Never stop praying. Be thankful in all circumstances, for this is God’s will for you who belong to Christ Jesus.” 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18.

  • New Sense of Love

    New Sense of Love

    May 17th at 2:20 am, I witnessed a miracle like one I’ve never witnessed before. Overwhelming feelings of happiness, joy, and love raced through me all at once like never before. It is a day that will forever be etched in my memories as my wife Shelby and I welcomed our perfect little baby boy, Ryatt Boyd Vezain into this world. There for a minute the world stood still! Nothing else mattered, it was pure bliss. I couldn’t stop smiling when they laid the little man on his mother’s chest and she just held him ever so gently. Then, they put him in my arms and it melted me. I didn’t know a person could love something so much. As I looked at him and his dark blue eyes, his full head of slightly red tinted hair, his button nose that looked just like his mom’s, his itty bitty fingers and toes, I couldn’t help but notice how perfect he was. I just wanted to hold him forever. It was the proudest moment of my life. Words can not even explain how proud of my wife I was. After carrying the little guy for nine months and then watching her in the hospital that day I couldn’t help but just be admired by her strength and beauty as she birthed the perfect little miracle that God had so precisely knitted in her womb. I was so proud of her, feelings I can’t even explain have been born inside of me that I didn’t even know were possible.
    As we brought Ryatt home and began taking on this new responsibility a new sense of love has swept over me. Actually, to be honest Shelby does most of it I just do the fun stuff like rock him to sleep after feeding and play with him while he’s awake, Shelby does all the hard chores. She is such a great mother! But, as Ryatt turned two weeks old the other day I have noticed a change in both of us. Since he showed up he is the first and foremost of our attention. His mother and I would do anything for the well being of that kid. As a new parent I would go to the deepest depths and not even second guess it for my child. I would give up everything to make sure our boy has everything he needs to succeed. I know from here on out will be a learning experience like none before and there will be times that I will make mistakes but for the most part I have a completely new sense of unselfishness to where I would do and give anything for our kid.
    Although I will never completely understand the depth of the Lords love, nor will I ever be able to love like the Lord loves us, I have a new sense of the love he has for us. As I love my wife and my child more than anything in this entire world, it doesn’t even come close to how much God loves each and every single one of us. The way I looked at Ryatt the first few minutes of his life and how perfect he was, is how God sees us every single moment of our lives.
    Psalms 139:13 “You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb.” Psalms 139:16-18 “You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me, O God. They cannot be numbered! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand! And when I wake up, you are still with me!”
    The Lord loved us before we were born and every day we wake up he still loves us just as much. In John it tells us that there is no greater love than to lay down your life for your friends. What did Jesus do? He laid down his life for each and everyone of us. John 3:16 “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.” I am forever grateful for this love.
    No matter what hardship you are facing. No matter how far off the deep end you think you have went. When you feel like there is no way God will accept what you have done. When you feel like there is no way God can love you because of the storm you are in, remember that he made you a miracle. He knit you together in your mother’s womb. He loved you enough to make all your delicate parts. He knew you before you were even born. And, the precious thoughts he has about you can’t even be numbered! He loved you enough to send his Son to die on the cross so we could have eternity with him, and it is never to late to accept his love!
    Ephesians 2:10 “For we are God’s masterpiece. He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.”

  • Facing Fear

    Facing Fear

    Have you ever been scared to let go? Have you ever wondered what was going to happen next? Well if you have you are definitely human. If you haven’t you are special. Being scared is a human feeling. I’m pretty sure we have all been scared at least once in our lives. There is nothing wrong with being scared or even terrified for that matter. It’s what we do with our fear that matters. When fear starts to try to creep up on us we have two choices: give in to it or give it to God. Fear is the devil trying to tell us we can’t, we aren’t strong enough, or we won’t make it. Fear is the enemy lying to us. When we listen to his voice, it paralyzes us. When we hand it over to God it liberates us-sets us free from the enemies grip. When we hand our fears over it takes the pressure off of us and we can find strength and refuge in Jesus.

    Shelby and I recently moved back home to continue rehab at the house. We got a bunch of equipment set up in the garage and have it turned  into the rehab gym. We even took some climbing harness and a pulley system over the tread mill and have our own locomotor training walking machine set up. Needless to say my wife, brother in laws,  and I  have been vigorously training at the house. In the last month I haven’t had any huge new breakthroughs just the same leg movements as before but definitely getting stronger and stronger.

    One thing I had been waiting to do since the accident was get horseback again. It had been over six months since I had been on the back of  a horse, the longest in my entire life that I can remember. I had been trying to get to a place and ride while in Utah but kept having complications due to getting cleared by the surgeons. But, typical JR Vezain attitude, I was determined to make it happen regardless of what they said as soon as I got home.

    We got home Friday night and Saturday afternoon I was saddled up figuring out a way to get on. With a little ingenuity we transferred me over on to the flat bed of a pickup, stepped ol’ Rosie over, lifted one leg on the other side, and with a boost got swung up in the middle and set down. Instant freedom! I was ready to roll wherever I wanted to go around the ranch. Not confined to my wheelchair and where it could go anymore. I had a new set of legs ready to roam. I could go ride through the cows and look at the place that I had been away from for over six months. Then, I turned her to ride off and it didn’t feel the same. It wasn’t like it was before. I knew it was going to feel different but I didn’t know how different. I didn’t have any weight in my legs. I couldn’t really feel where I was in the saddle. My balance was off so I was death gripped on the saddle horn and bared down on my rope holding myself on.

    As I rode out of the yard I was already getting tired. My arm was tired from pulling on my rope. My legs felt like they were squeezing as hard as they could yet I couldn’t feel the weight in my feet. My whole body flexing to stay in the middle. Then, I got to thinking what if my horse spooks? I wasn’t seat belted in so I wondered if I would tip off the side. What if she began to trot could I control her enough to keep her the speed I wanted to go? Could I turn her around and go back to the house? What if I did fall off   how would I get anywhere? It seemed the harder I tried to stay on and keep her at a slow walk the more she wanted to go. She would speed up a little so I would pull on her mouth then she’d prance around and I would struggle to keep my balance. The more I squeezed the harder I worked the more wore out I got.

    I kept going though. The more I rode the more comfortable I got. The more I loosened up and gave her her head, the smoother the ride got. If I just let her go and just worried about staying in the middle the easier the ride got. The looser my grip got the more relaxed I felt.

    I gave her her head and rode out around the field about thirty minutes total. She knew her way around the pasture and led me back to the house safe and sound and it felt amazing! It was awesome to connect with a horse again. Great to be horse back even if it was only for a minute.

    Once I was back in my wheelchair I was sitting on the porch enjoying the evening reflecting on my ride when I came across the idea that life is just like that short little ride I went on. You can either go on your ride and let fear of the unknown, anxiety, or uncertainty take over. Grab hold of your rope and squeeze tight trying to control every step showing it where to go, unsure of what might spook her up; or you can swing up and give her her head. Trust in the Lord  and let her pick carefully the path she needs to take. She’ll lead you around the pasture and back home safe and sound with a smile on your face enjoying each step of the way no matter what uncertainties come your way.

    Proverbs 3:5-6 says  “Trust in the Lord with all your heart; do not depend on your own understanding. Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take.”

    You see we should not let fear or circumstances, outcomes or situations, grab ahold of our reins and take control of our lives. We should hand them over to the Lord, trust in him, and let him guide us where we need to go.